Framily.

What is it about those certain people in our lives that we choose to call our “best” friends? I often feel like it’s a term that is thrown around too lightly, and that we don’t appreciate the true meaning of that bold statement. So, I ask myself, what qualities is it that defines the differences for the people I call my “best”? 

I asked a few people how they defined the difference between their friends, and those they call their "best friends”. Here are some responses I felt particularly touched by:

“Best friends are those who I perceive would feel a genuine loss were I to disappear. In my relationships with best friends, I fill a unique niche for them that others would not.”

“Best friends are people you can be brutally honest with.”

“My best friends are the people who act like family should. They probably know me as well as I know myself, and helping each other doesn't involve going out of the way because helping each other is the way”

“My best friends know about my past and things, whereas my friends just know like, my personality.”

I’ve noticed my feelings for my best friends change post college-graduation.  One moved to grad school, one moved to Ecuador, and the other moved into my house. Or, should I say “our house”, because really- we’ve made it into our home.

C. and I are like the married couple of our household- constantly bickering about “Who is making dinner?!” or “It’s not MY turn to do the dishes!” or “I am ALWAYS the one who cleans!”, and we hassle N. about doing the “man” things…you know like mowing the lawn, change the battery from the smoke detector, etc. All the while, still loving and respecting each other when we’re having a weak moment, helping the other with groceries or bills, and being there to laugh wildly. We’ve been lucky enough to experience this new phase of life together and we often use each other as a ‘reality check’.

C.2 is living thousands of miles away, but I think of her as our sibling that’s just gone for a while. We talk on the phone, Skype, email, and chat almost once a week. When we do, it’s full of chatter, laughter, venting, and of course the tears. “It’s funny,” I told her last week on the phone, “Because I support you in wherever you go, or whatever you do….but I’m ready for you to come home now.”  She later wrote me an email saying “Even though we’re in different hemispheres, I still feel us growing and changing together.” She is right.

We’re different in as many ways as we are the same. We all have different goals, struggles, and life directions.

S. and K. are both moving on with different things in their life…from Graduate school, to exploring new places to live. But, when we’re all together it’s as if nothing has ever changed. These are the people who make me the happiest.

Saying we’re “brutally honest” with each other would be an understatement. Except, I wouldn’t say “brutal”, I would say “respectfully honest.” We’re constantly helping each other out, whether it’s finances, stress, or just a good laugh. From bad boyfriends to music festivals, we treat each other like family….we’re more like Framily. I must say that every person I call a friend holds a special place in my heart.

I’ll conclude with this: My friends know who I am; and my best friends know why.

Here’s to you, Framily. Thanks for being my support, motivation, and happiness. 

Us in McCall, during C.2's semester in Costa Rica

Summer 2010

Graduation photoshoot